#12. How choosing right friends is a crucial life choice?

Author

Uki D. Lucas
May 15, 2024

Dear Friend

Today, I would like to celebrate one of my best friends.

If you're reading it, you know it's about you.

We served together in the military, lived in Okinawa, and attended the same university for Japanese Studies. We had profound and life-changing discussions. We also had to work hard on our characters and rise above what life has served us. 🙂 Your accomplishments are spectacular, and I am proud of you.

Our paths have diverged by continents and separated by life circumstances. We met once in a blue moon to go diving, hiking, or skiing, but we never really kept in touch. I still think of you as one of my best friends and a huge influence on my life. Cheers mate!

The choice of friends

The choice of friends, along with that of your spouse, might be the most important one in your life. Choose carefully.

Few people can rise above their birth circumstances without the right choice of those around them.

The choice of who your friends are... will determine who you become. You have heard the cliché, "You're the average of the five people you spend the most time with." The choice of how you spend time with them is also critical.

See if you detect a pattern:
You'd have to drag me to "social events," but I organized hundreds of conferences and meetups. I like meeting new people but am allergic to loud bars and parties. I love sitting with a friend in the cafe while talking for hours. I gladly fly across the ocean to see them for a few hours, but I will not go to a birthday party unless forced. I guess it is all about the quality of these relationships.

Your friends will comfort you when you are down. Everyone counts on that, but the flip side is equally important. They will also challenge you in a discussion.

We have a stereotype of Mediterranean culture discussions with loud voices and hands gesturing. Seek such people. The discussions should be brutally honest; it should both be fun and challenging.

The only way you know your friend is the right one is when, after talking to them, you are pumped up to do something great; you pick up that art project you have neglected, study, or work on something you wished for but never did.

P.S.

  • Listening to Luciana Zogbi

  • Today, the most notable media content was the Google I/O.

How can you get more value from this?

  1. You should personalize your profile so I can send you topics that interest you.

  2. You should reply to my emails. It makes us friends.

  3. You should share this letter with friends. I am not kidding.

My mission statement:

“A compendium of letters blending technology startup management, stoic philosophy, active lifestyle ethos, and a love for culture. It aims to mentor and inspire through insightful content and practical advice, focusing on personal and professional growth for a balanced and fulfilling life.”

~ Uki D. Lucas, cultural anthropologist, ex-U.S. Marine, leader, writer, mentor

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